It's on like Donkey Kong!

I posed the Biggest Loser-style challenge to Lacy last night, and no surprise here, she accepted the challenge! We stepped on the scale for “fun” last night – I put that in quotes that because right now, the number on the scale is anything but fun –  and we’re actually pretty damn close.  We’re within about 5 pounds of one another, so it’s going to be a fairly level playing field in that respect.  She’s going down! Literally…and figuratively!

Our competitiveness got a kick start last night when she was poking fun at me for being pretty flexible for a fluffy chick.  (What? You can’t put your toes in your ears? I can!) I asked her to try, and she couldn’t even get close.  I laughed, and told her I’d be her slave for 10 minutes if she could sit on the floor, legs in a “V” and touch her forehead to the ground for 5 seconds.  Once again, not even close! I was victorious! I was basking in the afterglow until she challenged me double or nothing to a last man standing wall sit.   Lacy was a powerlifter in high school and has told me stories about doing wall sits for endless amounts of time… intimidated as I was, it was game on!  I could feel the burn but I wasn’t giving up.  Finally she said, “Oh shit, I’m going to lose, I can’t do this!” And about 15 seconds later she sank to the floor.  VICTORY was mine! 

I’m feeling pretty good, pretty confident with these minor victories behind me.  I’m also really out of shape and totally paying for it today.  Walking down the stairs was killer this morning! Pushing in my clutch in traffic today almost brought tears to my eyes.  It’s a sad state of existence, but just wait… Just give me a few months and it will be a whole nother story! On the other hand, at least I know I have muscles somewhere under that layer of fluff because they are definitely letting themselves be known today! Owww-ie!

On the left hand side of my page you’ll see I added a little feature called “Winnie Says…” and you’re probably like, “who the F is Winnie and what’s she got to say?”  Well, Winnie is my “care manager”.  That’s such an ugly term, makes me feel like I need a helmet and to get on the shortbus… Anyway, it’s not a big secret that I struggle with depression and anxiety. Winnie is part of a program (DIAMOND) through my doctor’s office that supplements my medical care and depression meds by being an intermediary between my doctor and I, and she has a consulting psychiatrist she works with as well, and it just helps keep my depression in check, my meds at the right dosages and helps me set goals to over come the areas I feel really overwhelmed in at the moment.  I talk to her via telephone on Thursday mornings.  I have turned down this program for years, but finally decided to give it a whirl, because, what’s the use of looking great on the outside if you’re still a mess on the inside? 

I frankly think some of it’s hokey.  Her stupid questionnaire I have to answer every time we talk is the most ridiculous thing.  “How many days last week did you have a poor appetite or overeat?”  Well, duh, all of them, I’m a fat girl! I ate more than my fair share every day, bitch! I think that some of her “goals” and ideas for me to do are plain old stupid and it makes me feel like I’m six again, but I’ve decided that I’m going to give this a go – I want to be well all the way around, she is a “professional” and my insurance is padding her pockets nicely, so we’ll see.  I’m only two weeks into it.  In six months if I think the DIAMOND program is a waste of my time and she’s full of poo, I can quit and no harm, no foul. Right? Right.

So that little box over there is full of her weekly suggestions for me. No matter how hokey and ridiculously stupid I think they are, I’m gonna put them out there and at least give it a more-than-half-hearted attempt at reaching those “goals” in addition to the ones I set for myself above.

I’m beginning to wean myself off of caffeine.  This should be a trip.  A regular old riot and a half.  I’ve had one Low Carb Monster this morning.  I’m on my first huge glass of water (I’m gonna pee a lot), and I’m going to try really, really, really hard to not have any soda or any more caffeine today.  I have a feeling I might have to give in and have a Diet Coke around dinner time because of the headache I will probably get, but this weekend I’m fully preparing myself mentally to go through caffeine withdrawal and just get it over with.

Wish me luck!

Lose or Lose! Either way, you still lose!

I’m a competitive person by nature, but I can take my ass when it’s handed to me.  My girlfriend on the other hand, however, is the single most competitive person I have ever met.  She simply does not like to lose.  She doesn’t lose often, but when she does, it’s not pretty.  Usually I get annoyed and stomp off screaming, “I’m never playing with you again!” Except this time… I think I finally see how this is going to be a positive thing!

We’re going out for our mini-anniversary dinner tonight and I’m going to issue her a challenge that I know she won’t be able to say no to.  I’m going to challenge her to lose weight with me, Biggest Loser style.  Well, sort of, except no one really gets eliminated and we’re already home, and don’t have Jillian Michaels in my living room, but you get the point.  If it’s a competition, she’ll be on board.  And I’m just sure enough of myself in this area to egg her on enough where I have a feeling it might get pretty fierce in our household!  At least that’s what I’m counting on happening, and knowing Lacy and her disdain for “not-winning”… I’m willing to bet she takes the bait and accepts the challenge.

We’ve got some pretty big stuff coming up, including Easter (cheesy potatoes!!!) and a catered luncheon (Mexican from Pepitos!) and a hodgepodge of crap at home to weed out of the cupboards.  It’s really too tempting to pass those things up when you are only a few days in to making changes.  Rather than get discouraged and give up, May 1 is looking pretty good for a starting point.  Especially if Miss Lacy accepts the challenge and is prepared to lose! or lose! (You get my point.)

That doesn’t mean I am going to squander away the week and a half I have in front of me.  No.  My goals for the 10 days leading up to May 1 are going to be taking little steps that will prepare me to kick it in to high gear.  I would like to mainly break my caffeine addiction, thereby eliminating both caffeine and artificial sweeteners from my diet all together.  I’m going to set up the Biggest Loser on Wii and track down that kick butt yoga DVD, too.  Clean out the cupboards and look for my big girl panties, so I can suck it up, put them on and DO THIS!